Celebrities play a large role in our society, and their influence has grown significantly in the past few decades. This article aims to take a general look at celebrity impact with a brief focus on healthcare-related topics, and then transition to gay celebrities and surrogacy. Surrogacy, like almost all things in our current lives, is influenced by celebrities. The view these public figures provide into their private lives is compelling, and how gay celebrities discuss surrogacy can lead to changes in public perception and even regulations.

One of the most impactful transitions in the more recent history of celebrity culture came about at Vogue by Anna Wintour. Models were replaced by Hollywood stars on the covers of Vogue throughout the 1990s, and in 1998 eight of the twelve covers contained celebrities. This change was adapted to almost all publications after Vogue, with one cultural historian stating:

‘’When you go to the newsstand now, on magazine after magazine — whether it’s Vogue or Cigar Aficionado — we see the faces of celebrities looking out at us,’’ he said. ‘’In the eyes of the public, models are unidimensional. They are purely visual, whereas celebrities have these lives we can attach to and they seem more fully dimensional to us’’ (1).

This idea of the public ‘attaching to’ and identifying with celebrity lives has also led to changes in healthcare-related areas. One example of this has been termed the ‘Katie Couric Effect.’ This comes from the famous newscaster having a colonoscopy on TV in order to demonstrate the process and encourage others to get screened for colon cancer. This was prompted after the unfortunate passing of her husband, and the ‘Katie Couric Effect’ has been studied in scientific journals and found to have increased colon cancer screening in America by 20% (2). More recently, Angelina Jolie wrote a New York Times article in 2013 to share that she underwent a preventive double mastectomy after testing positive for a BRCA1 gene mutation. This celebrity disclosure led to an 88% increase in the number of women who were referred to genetic counseling over the following year (3), demonstrating that more women felt empowered to question and address a possible cancer diagnosis.

I believe that the celebrity influence on healthcare-related topics are especially applicable to surrogacy. Surrogacy has historically been more of a private process, similar to how people would approach topics such as colonoscopies and mastectomies. However, by not being open about health or how we live our lives, we make it easy to ignore and remain ignorant about issues that affect us personally and as a society. For a few years now, gay celebrities have been some of the most outspoken and encouraging about their surrogacy and family building journeys, and I wanted to take this opportunity to highlight some gay celebrity dads, their rainbow families, and the perspectives they have shared to help make surrogacy more mainstream for other men.

Elton John and David Furnish

(Source: Instagram)

Elton John and David Furnish are the proud parents to two boys, Zachary and Elijah, pictured above from a throwback Instagram post for Father’s Day. The couple worked with the same surrogate in California for each of their son’s pregnancies. Gay men often will work with the same surrogate for multiple children, as they have built such a strong relationship and trust through the first journey that it makes sense to collaborate — if possible — on future children. In fact, some gay men discuss potential ‘sibling journeys’ with a surrogate before or early on in a first pregnancy. Even being world famous for decades, Elton John has still said that his children are his top priority:

‘That was the greatest decision I’ve made — well — we’ve made.’ the proud dad explained. ‘They’re our primary concern. They’re the things that come first and foremost’ (4).

Ricky Martin and Jwan Yosef

(Source: Instagram)

Ricky Martin and Jwan Yosef are parents to four children: twin boys, Valentino and Matteo; a girl, Lucia; and their youngest son, Renn (pictured above). When interviewed about how Ricky selected the woman who he would work with for the surrogacy, he shared the following:

When Ricky spoke on the phone to the woman who would eventually carry his children, he said, ‘Why do you do this?’ And she said, ‘Because I’m a very spiritual woman, and I’ve never felt closer to God than that moment where I can give the gift of life to someone that cannot do it on his own.’ Ricky then replied, ‘You are the one’ (5).

Even working with gay men, women often describe religion and their spiritual beliefs as a large reason for wanting to become surrogates. Even with strong religious convictions, some surrogates prefer working with gay fathers-to-be compared to heterosexual couples, stating that gay men can sometimes provide a more profound relationship than intended mothers who have lingering feelings of loss due to infertility. This shame and remorse around infertility for women, which cannot be experienced by gay men, can hinder the relationship and journey, according to some surrogates (6).

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka

(Source: Instagram)

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka are the fathers to fraternal twins, Harper and Gideon. Both Neil and David expressed a desire to have biological children, and so they separated the eggs from their donor, each fertilized a portion to create embryos, and then implanted one embryo from each father for the twins. Of note, Neil has been interviewed and stated that he and David have no interest in knowing which of the children is from which father (7). While genetic connection is an important factor in gay men’s desire to pursue surrogacy compared to adoption, it is not the primary factor for most, based on published research. My previous Medium article, ‘From Stonewall to Surrogacy: The LGBTQ+ Community and Family Planning’ (https://medium.com/@babymoonfamily/from-stonewall-to-surrogacy-the-lgbtq-community-and-family-planning-bc981cd27e47) dives more into this research, showing that gay men prefer surrogacy to adoption more due to the fact that the emotional and financial risks and uncertainties with adoption are greater than with surrogacy.

Anderson Cooper and Benjamin Maisani

(Source: Instagram)

Newscaster Anderson Cooper has two sons, Wyatt and Sebastian, that he co-parents with Benjamin Maisani. Like other gay partnerships, Anderson has discussed the nomenclature in the household for children with two dads, ‘Wyatt calls me Daddy, and Benjamin is Papa’ (8). This is a fun exercise for gay male parents. My partner and I have experimented with a similar naming scheme when talking about each other with our Corgi puppy in preparation for our future child. In discussing his surrogate, Anderson has only had kind words:

‘The sacrifices she and her family — her entire family — made and the love that they gave Sebastian this past year has been extraordinary,’ Cooper said. ‘We’ll never forget the kindness’ (8).

This speaks to the reality that many gay fathers continue to have close relationships with their surrogate and their surrogate’s family after the birth of the child.

Andy Cohen

(Source: Instagram)

The BFF of Anderson Cooper, Andy Cohen has also been on a fatherhood journey as perhaps the most famous single dad in New York City. Andy has two children, a son named Benjamin, and a daughter named Lucy. Andy has actually been a staunch advocate for gestational surrogacy in the State of New York. Before 2020, gestational surrogacy of any kind was illegal in New York. Andy worked with New York Governor Cuomo to pass the Child-Parent Security Act of 2020, paving the way for gestational surrogacy in the state. His daughter, Lucy, was one of the first surrogate babies born in New York State (9). In terms of the logistics of surrogacy for gay men, they often have to travel from surrogacy-unfriendly to surrogacy-friendly states, delivering in places where family and friends are not close by.

Andy has said, ‘I wanted to have the baby in New York, and so I wanted my surrogate to have the baby in New York’ (9). His advocacy in changing the law for New York made this a possibility for him and his daughter.

Tan France and Rob France

(Source: Instagram)

Queer Eye and style sensation Tan France has recently welcomed his second child via surrogacy. Tan and his husband have two sons, Ismail and Isaac, and Tan had nothing but amazing things to say about their surrogate:

‘And a huge thank you to our incredible warrior of a surrogate, for giving us the greatest gift one could ever give…Our surrogate is doing so great, post labor, and we couldn’t be more grateful for the greatest gift in our lives’ (10).

In true celebrity influencer fashion, Tan also tried to address the stigma and misrepresentation around surrogacy:

‘There is so much stigma [around surrogacy] and a lot of the time it is just ignorance. ‘[People] think I am snatching a woman off the street, tying her to a radiator in my basement, impregnating her and starving her just to have my child, then kicking her to the curb when it’s done. That is not the case at all. They are treated beautifully’ (10).

This statement is powerful in that it is a gay celebrity calling attention to the falsehood and misinformation around surrogacy, and peeling back the curtain to the truth of a beautiful relationship and journey.

Adam Kay and James Farrell

(Source: 11)

Former doctor and bestselling author Adam Kay recently revealed that he is a father of two babies via surrogacy with Game of Thrones producer partner James Farrell. Adam’s story resonated with me in particular because I recently read his novel, ‘This is Going to Hurt,’ and as a former doctor as well, I found it hilarious and a bit traumatizing in its accuracy of the portrayal of physician training. While I am a US-trained physician, the parallels to the UK and NHS training program are many. Discussing the impact having children has had on his life, Adam shared, ’I don’t need to explain the way that having kids changes your life, but it’s absolutely transformed it for the better and also ruined it’ (12). I have heard similar joking responses from other gay (and straight) parents, and I believe Adam has captured how universal the response is to parenthood. I hope Adam will use his talent and wit to write about his experiences with surrogacy and fatherhood.

Ryan Murphy and David Miller

(Source: 13)

The final couple I wanted to highlight are the famous TV creator Ryan Murphy and his partner David Miller. While working tirelessly to generate iconic queer TV shows such as ‘Glee,’ ‘American Horror Story,’ and ‘Pose,’ Ryan managed to find time to have three sons via surrogacy. The family has also battled and won against cancer. Their middle son, Ford, was diagnosed with a neuroblastoma — a rare type of cancer that mostly affects young children — in 2016 when he was only two years old. He bravely underwent surgery and treatment and was deemed cancer-free the year before the birth of his baby brother. In discussing how he manages to juggle the demands of Hollywood with fatherhood, Ryan has said, ‘I have a really, really busy life but I still make it home every day, you know, to put them to bed and to give them baths’ (14). Echoing the priorities of Elton John and other gay celebrities, Ryan manages to put his children and family first despite his larger-than-life career.

The examples described above for gay celebrities and their surrogacy journeys emphasize the impact high profile, public personas can have. These celebrities have brought light to issues including:

Genetic parentage for gay men
Regulations and changing the law for surrogacy in an influential U.S. state
Deep relationships and bonds shared with their surrogates
Practicalities, challenges, and normalcy of gay fatherhood

These stories resonate with me as a gay man, and I know these and future celebrities will continue to have an impact on others considering fatherhood.

Feel free to comment and share any other gay celebrities and their surrogacy journeys that I have not included.

References:

Gay Celebrities and Surrogacy

BABYMOON FAMILY

Gay Celebrities and Surrogacy

The Beginning of Our Surrogacy Journey

From Stonewall to Surrogacy: The LGBTQ+ Community and Family Planning

BABYMOON FAMILY