Embryo Donation and Queer Intended Parents
I love hearing about queer people creating rainbow families in any ethical way. This week, I read an article where a gay couple in Pennsylvania are pursuing their dream of fatherhood through ‘non-genetic surrogacy.’ This term meant they were leveraging embryo donation to have children. This got me thinking: How common is embryo donation? How accessible is it for queer IPs? Would my husband and I donate our unused embryos? Read more to find out.
Contemplating Life, Death, and Divorce while Reviewing Our Egg Donor Contract
Our journey to fatherhood continues with our latest milestone: The egg donor contract. This contract brought up a lot of interesting topics for my husband and me. We had to contemplate our own mortality, relationship, and future in a way that we haven’t yet. In this article, I reflect on this experience to share it with other queer intended dads.
How to Have an Ethical Surrogacy Journey Outside the United States
Due to financial considerations, more and more queer men are opting to pursue IVF and surrogacy outside the United States. In this article, I describe what I consider to be the minimum requirements for any journey to be considered ethical. My hope is that this can help queer men navigate their options and pursue an ethical journey in any country.
The Waiting Game of Having a Baby Through IVF and Surrogacy
Having a baby through IVF and surrogacy as a queer man is a marathon, not a sprint. In this article, I describe the first 1.5 years of my husband’s and my journey thus far. There have been some amazing highs, but there have also been a number of long periods of waiting. Focusing on the journey, not the destination, is one of the goals of BabyMoon Family, and one that I hope to emulate on my own journey to fatherhood.
I am Writing a Book about IVF and Surrogacy for Queer Men
I am writing a book about IVF and surrogacy for queer men. None exists, and it’s time we have one. In this article, I draft a Table of Contents based on articles I have written, and then I highlight missing content that could be written to fill out the book. Read through and see if there are any topics that are missing or that you would like to have more of in the book.
Not Every Income Situation Has U.S. Surrogacy as an Option
More queer men are turning to IVF and surrogacy abroad. Why? Largely the prohibitive cost of the procedures and journey in the United States. So what are the costs abroad for queer intended dads? What is the future of international IVF and surrogacy for queer fathers? Read more to find out.
As Alabama Essentially Bans IVF, My Husband and I Write a Thank You Letter to Our Egg Donor
The Alabama Supreme Court has taken a huge step in essentially banning IVF in the state by stating that embryos are ‘children.’ This comes at a time when my husband and I are continuing our journey to fatherhood through IVF and surrogacy in California, and we are drafting a heartfelt thank you letter to our egg donor. This juxtaposition highlights the political, social, scientific divide we have in our country and the world at the moment. What is the way forward? For BabyMoon Family and I, it is to fight for gay, bi, queer men to have access to the science that allows them to build the rainbow families of their dreams.
10 Questions to Discuss before Pursuing Surrogacy (Part 2)
My husband and I are on our first journey to fatherhood through surrogacy. This article (Part 2 of 2, see below for Part 1) suggests questions that any queer man should try and answer before starting the process of surrogacy. It’s a long journey, but if you think what is important to you and the creation of your family, it can be an even more enjoyable journey.
10 Questions to Discuss Before Pursuing Surrogacy (Part 1)
My husband and I are on our first journey to fatherhood through surrogacy. This article suggests questions that any queer man should try and answer before starting the process of surrogacy. It’s a long journey, but if you think what is important to you and the creation of your family, it can be an even more enjoyable journey.
How to Navigate Picking an Egg Donor
What’s it like picking an egg donor? This article is about the challenges and process that my husband and I have undertaken in approaching our selection of an egg donor. Choosing an egg donor is an exciting and important step in anyone’s journey to fatherhood through IVF and surrogacy, and I hope this article is helpful for anyone embarking on this stage.
Science Says: Gay Parents are Better than Straight Parents
New scientific research shows that gay parents outperform straight parents in terms of health and well-being of the children, coparenting, and the overall dynamics of the family. In our first BabyMoon Family journal club, I review the study in this article.
Queer and / or Gay? Identity Challenges When Building a LGBTQ+ Focused Company
How do men of the LGBTQ+ community identify? And how does this affect building a brand and business for them? This article discusses the challenges I have had to be both specific and inclusive in building BabyMoon Family.
The BabyMoon Family Vision: A Comprehensive Reproduction Center for All Queer People
The ultimate vision for BabyMoon Family is a comprehensive reproductive center for all queer people, by queer people, leveraging the amazing LGBTQ+ community to make rainbow families a reality. This would be the world’s first queer reproductive center, but how would it work? Read more here.
Why Do Women Become Gestational Carriers?
Gestational carriers (GCs) are incredible. However, who are the women who do this? This article attempts to describe the persona and motivations for these amazing women to become GCs. Queer men would not be able to become biological parents without them, and so we are forever indebted to their partnership on this journey.
What is it Like to Undergo Egg Donation?
What is it like to donate your eggs or ovaries? This article aims to describe this process for women, and also to provide more understanding and empathy for intended parents (IPs). It’s important to know medical details and challenges that women go through in order to make the incredible donation of ovaries.
Masturbating in a Clinic as a Queer Dad-to-Be
Continuing on our personal journey to fatherhood, my husband and I traveled from Stockholm to Los Angeles to our fertility clinic. This article describes the physical exam, lab testing, and all important sperm deposit. What is it like to masturbate in a clinic and give a sperm sample? If you ever wanted to know, read on.
Psychological ‘Labor’ for Queer Dads-to-Be
Having a baby is a big deal for anyone. However, having a baby as a queer man adds another layer to the process, but what can queer men do in order to mentally prepare for having a baby? Psychologists have devised ‘psychological labor’ to describe the preparation that men can undergo to have a baby. Read this article to learn more.
ChatGPT Wrote an Article on Gestational Surrogacy
What does ChatGPT know about surrogacy? In this article, I give ChatGPT a prompt regarding gestational surrogacy for queer men. I then share its its output as well as my critical review of the contents. Let’s see what AI knows about surrogacy, and what it can still be taught from humanity and the Internet.
The Beginning of Our Surrogacy Journey
My husband and I are currently pursing IVF and surrogacy in California while living in Sweden. This is the first of what will be many articles detailing our journey. In this article, I discuss all the major decision points for the process, as I believe it is important to have a full understanding and a complete perspective as to the type of journey you want to have before embarking on it. This article provides an overview of all the major decisions and team members you will need to involve in your own journey to gay fatherhood through surrogacy.